I ain't dead you know!
by Rouroken
Summary: The title speaks for itself. Kaoru was dead and Kenshin refused to let it go. But maybe he doesn't have to...did Kaoru really die?
1. My life is shot, literally

Hi guys, I had too much sugar when I was writing this but I hope you enjoy it. This one probably doesn't sound too good but thank you for taking the time to read it!  
  
Chapter one: Suffocating  
  
Everyone was there; the Kenshin gumi, Tae, Tsubame, Misao, even Aoshi. They all came to say their final farewells to Kaoru, who died just yesterday. Out of all of them, Kenshin was probably the one who was pained the most by her death.  
  
Flashback ************************************************************************ Kenshin and the others were at the market buying food for dinner when they heard gunshots. Kenshin had streaked ahead of everyone to see what the commotion was and found that a man was being pursued by a bunch of drunkards who had guns. Of course, Kenshin attempted to save the man and obviously got hurt in the process. Police were arriving but there were at least three people who were shooting like crazy. Kenshin stood in front of the victim attempting to fight off the enemies but when they all shot constantly at once, a bullet managed to graze his side. The police killed the drunkards on the spot but one of them shot another bullet before they fell to the ground and was headed straight for Kenshin. Still stunned from his wound, he didn't notice it when he saw Kaoru running like mad towards him.  
  
"Kenshin look out!!!" as she pushed him out of the way.  
  
*BANG!*  
  
The drunkards were dragged away and Kaoru was now lying on her side in a crimson pool of blood, a bullet in her chest. Kenshin stood there motionless, his horror filled eyes transfixed on the girl in front of him. He broke into a run towards her.  
  
"Kaoru-dono!!!!!!!!!!!" He gently picked her up and held her to him, hot tears falling from his amethyst eyes to Kaoru's paled face.  
  
"Kenshin." he opened his eyes and looked at her face. She was smiling! But why? Kaoru lifted a trembling hand to wipe the tears from his face.  
  
"I'm glad.I'm glad you're okay.Kenshin." Kenshin lifted his own hand and rested it over hers, new tears forming.  
  
"Kaoru-dono, why? Why did you do that?" he asked holding her closer. Tears started to come out of Kaoru's eyes. He wiped them away as she spoke in a voice almost inaudible.  
  
"Because I love you.and I always will.I'm glad I met you and everyone else Kenshin." Kenshin felt his heart ripping.  
  
"No Kaoru, please! Don't go!" He begged as he saw her eyes closing. Kaoru smiled weakly.  
  
"That.is the first time.that you've ever said my name with out the 'dono'.thank you Kenshin, I'm glad that I was able to hear that from you.I'll always love you.Sumanai but I can't hold on anymore.but I promise I won't ever leave you.I promise." And then her eyes fell shut and she went limp. Kenshin held her tightly will he sobbed quietly.  
  
"Kaoru..KAORU!!!"  
  
Megumi took the bullet out, but she told them she was dead, that the bullet had gone through her heart.  
  
End flashback ************************************************************************  
  
That happened yesterday. They were now getting ready to bury her next to her in Kyoto, where she wanted to be buried next to an old friend. Everyone was in tears. Sano was holding Megumi, Aoshi was holding Misao, and Tae had her arms around Yahiko and Tsubame. They couldn't believe she was gone. Kenshin.he was by himself, not wanting to be touched by anyone. The only one he wanted to hold and be held by was Kaoru, but he knew that wouldn't happen. Kaoru was dead.  
  
'Kaoru.why.why did you have to leave.I didn't even get a chance to tell you.to tell you how much I loved you.Kaoru.I never got to tell you that I love you.' Just as she was being buried Kenshin broke into a run for the forest. He didn't want to be there. He couldn't bear seeing her like that, he couldn't bear that she was gone. 'Why did this happen? WHY?!'  
  
Once Kenshin felt he was far enough away he fell to his knees and started sobbing. 'Why did she have to die? Why couldn't it have been me?' Suddenly, he felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned to see Sanosuke looking at him with concerned and sorrowful eyes.  
  
"Come Kenshin, we're going back to Tokyo now." Kenshin was too sad and overwhelmed to protest. He let Sano drag him back. He didn't care, everything seemed to shatter. But one thing that Sano said was the only thing that kept him going.  
  
"Kenshin, before Kaoru ran to save you she told me if anything happened to her to tell you to live on and take care of the dojo for her, to live there and think of it as your home. She told me that the dojo was to be given to you to live in so you won't have to wander anymore. Are you willing to do that for her?" Kenshin nodded but he didn't smile. It was a sad slow journey back to Tokyo for all of them.  
  
Meanwhile back in Kyoto around sometime late at night the mound that was supposed to be Kaoru's grave suddenly popped as a person sat up spitting dirt out and brushing herself off. 'What is going on I wasn't dead! But I was going to be if I stayed under all this much longer!' She got up and recognized this place immediately. She was in Kyoto! 'This was the place I wanted to be buried at once I died.' She thought of Kenshin and the others how sad and heartbroken they must be. But why did they think she was dead? Was her breathing that low to the point it was unnoticeable? In truth, the bullet had gotten close to her heart but it didn't get her heart. 'I've got to get back to the others.to Kenshin.' she thought as she ran through the abandoned streets of Kyoto to for a place where she could rest up. She would need to in order to prepare for the long journey back to Tokyo. Back to Kenshin.  
  
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Well there's the first chapter. I hope you liked it at least a little and thanks again for reading it I know it sounds like crap. Please review and help me with it by giving me suggestions so I can make it sound better! Thank you and I'll see you all later!  
  
~Souryusen~ (It may sound like a boy name but I'm a girl!) 


	2. Back to Tokyo

Hi minna-san I'm back and I've got another chapter! I know not everyone is patient when it comes to updates I know I'm not so I try to update as soon as I can. Well anyway I hope you enjoy this chapter!  
  
Chapter two: Back to Tokyo  
  
"Kenshin," Yahiko quietly said coming into his room with a tray of food. Kenshin may have cooked but he never really ate. "You've got to eat something. You haven't eaten a thing since.you know." Neither Yahiko nor Sanosuke, heck nor anyone thought about bringing Kaoru up in front of Kenshin. They all knew he would break down instantly if they even mentioned her name. Kenshin had been sitting in a dark corner, still wearing the same clothes he had on yesterday and they were still stained with Kaoru's blood, the blood she shed to save him. 'Why?' he thought. 'Why did she have to die and shed blood to save someone like me?! I vowed to protect innocent people and yet I couldn't even protect the one I loved most!!! Why her? What did she ever do to deserve this?!' Tears started to flow from his eyes which were now dull instead of that glowing friendly amethyst color they usually had.  
  
"Kaoru, why did you do that? Why did you leave me? Why?!" Kenshin was sobbing now. Yahiko put the food down carefully and left the room to give him some time alone. Of all of them, Kenshin was the one who suffered the most from Kaoru's death. Yahiko eyes too started to brim with tears. Despite their constant quarreling and teasing Yahiko loved Kaoru as the older sister he never had. Ever since Kaoru died he hadn't touched his bokken or practiced. Sanosuke hadn't gone out at night like he usually did, he just stayed in the dojo and even helped with the cleaning. Megumi often stopped by to help out as well as check on everyone and she stopped flirting with Kenshin. Misao and Aoshi had already gone back to Kyoto to comfort Okina and the other Onniwabaan group members. It was like without Kaoru, everyone seemed lost especially Kenshin. Everyone was concerned about Kenshin, even though they gave him space and time alone they kept a close watch on him, for fear he might try to do it again. To their horror, Kenshin was becoming suicidal. Just yesterday Sanosuke, Yahiko, and Megumi, even Dr.Genzai and the girls had to stop Kenshin from killing himself. 'Kaoru.nothing's the same here with out you anymore.' Megumi stopped by again that afternoon to check on them.  
  
"Hey Megumi," Yahiko and Sanosuke murmured glumly. They all sat down and drank some tea.  
  
"Have you guys been okay lately?" she asked staring into her cup.  
  
"We've been alright," Sano replied. Yahiko just nodded and went on drinking his tea.  
  
"And what about Ken-san?" they looked at the ground.  
  
"Kenshin still won't eat or move from that spot. He refuses to change even," Yahiko said sadly shaking his head.  
  
"Poor guy, he seems so lost without Jou-chan. Heard he didn't even get a chance to tell her how much he loved her." Megumi let her bangs hide her eyes.  
  
"I was looking forward to the day he admitted his feelings to her. Demo, now it's too late." Just then they heard footsteps getting closer and closer. They turned around and their eyes widened.  
  
"Kenshin?" Kenshin was in a new gi and hakama and a sack was hung over his shoulder. He only said two things to them and went out the door.  
  
"I'm going to Kyoto. You guys stay here and look after the dojo I'll be back later."  
  
~In Kyoto~  
  
Kaoru slowly woke up from her sleep that afternoon. 'Wow I can't believe I slept in this long.' Fixing herself up she got ready to leave.  
  
"Thanks for letting me stay her Sayo," Kaoru said handing her the money to pay for the room.  
  
"Anytime," she smiled back. "Where are you headed now?"  
  
"I'm going to buy some supplies and then head back to Tokyo," Kaoru replied.  
  
"Hmmm, that's quite a journey, take care of yourself." Kaoru smiled.  
  
"Arigato, I will." And she headed out.  
  
Kaoru went back to the grave sight first to fix it so it didn't look like someone stole her body or something before she went to buy food and whatever else she needed. Then she went downtown to buy food and some different clothes. She had a plan on how to break the news to Kenshin and the others that she wasn't dead by posing as someone else. Instead of wearing her blue kimono, the one she had on when she was buried she put on a pink one with red flower petals decorating it and a black cape (Kind of like the one Misao wore when Kenshin first met her) to help disguise herself more. She also took off her indigo ribbon and tied her hair downward in a ponytail like Kenshin's with a thin, smaller red ribbon instead of wearing it up like she usually did. Once she was dressed she put on the cape but she didn't lift the hood over her head because she might look suspicious. Then she headed off on a journey to Tokyo.  
  
~Still in Tokyo~  
  
Kenshin walked down the streets of Tokyo taking the same route he did when he went to Kyoto before to fight Shishio. He stopped at the river where he had said good bye to her when he left Tokyo like he was doing now. He remembered that night clearly when the fireflies where surrounding them casting a soft glow on them both. He remembered how he wrapped his arms around her and embraced her for a short while in this last hug good bye. She felt so warm against him and he wished he could've stayed like that forever. Tears that refused to fall formed at the brim of his still dull eyes. What he wouldn't give to hold her in his arms again, to feel her next to him and hear her say she loved him again. 'Kaoru, I'll be coming to visit you shortly.' he thought as he trudged on.  
  
~At the dojo~  
  
"I wonder why Kenshin decided to go back to Kyoto all of a sudden," Yahiko said as he helped Megumi do the laundry Kenshin wasn't here to do.  
  
"I know, and so soon too." Megumi said back as she hung one of Kenshin's gis to dry. "I bet he went to visit Kaoru's grave since he wasn't there when she was buried."  
  
"You think so?" Yahiko asked. Megumi smiled.  
  
"I know so. That's how much Kenshin really loves her."  
  
~Kyoto~  
  
"Wow it's getting dark." Kaoru said to no one in particular as she looked at the setting sun. "I'd best set up camp." Finding a clearing in the forest she built a fire and spread out a blanket to sleep on. 'So this is what Kenshin went through during the time he wandered. This is what it feels like.' She thought. Her thoughts drifted to her family, the ones at the dojo whom she missed dearly. 'I wonder what they're doing right now.' she fell into deep slumber dreaming of Kenshin and the others.  
  
~In another forest miles away~  
  
Kenshin too was setting up camp getting ready to sleep. 'It's been awhile since I had to rough it outdoors that it has.' He said to himself as he leaned back against a tree. His thoughts drifted off to when he used to wander and how he had first met Kaoru. He remembered how she had tried to attack him; how she welcomed him into her home despite his past and the fact that he was the legendary Hitokiri Battiousai. She had given him her everything; a home, a family, and her unconditional love.and her life.he shed tears again. She had given him so much and what did he do in return? Nothing. He couldn't protect her when she was in danger and he couldn't save her when she was shot. 'Kaoru.' he remembered the pain he endured when he lost Tomoe. The pain was horrible. But this pain, the pain from losing Kaoru was different. It seemed much worse and much harder to deal with. What he felt for her was different from what he felt with Tomoe. He realized that the reason his pain was worse now that before was because the feelings he had for Kaoru were much stronger than the ones he had for Tomoe. Kenshin was able to get over Tomoe with Kaoru's help. But he wasn't sure if he would be able to get over Kaoru. He was sure he never would, 'Kaoru.I don't think I can ever get over this.I'm so lost without you.Kaoru.I.I want you back.' Those were his last thoughts before he fell into a deep sleep. Little did he know that he would soon see Kaoru again but she would be disguised as another person. Would he be able to see through her mask and find her? Will those two become reunited once again?  
  
I know, bad cliff hanger but you'll just have to be patient. Yeah yeah I get the point I'm really evil but I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Please send me a review and I'll see you again in chapter three!  
  
~Souryusen~ 


	3. Sakura

Okay everyone here's the next chapter like you asked. Sorry if I took too long but consider yourselves lucky that I don't take as long as others. Enjoy!  
  
Chapter three: Sakura  
  
Kaoru was getting up from her deep sleep when she heard a rustle in the bushes. 'Nani, who's there?!' The rustling got closer. 'Okay Kaoru stay steady, stay steady.on three I'll pounce him.' *Rustle* 'One.' *Rustle rustle* 'Two.' *Crack* *Thwomp!* "Wha-!!!" Kaoru realized she had pounced on an old man.  
  
"S-sumanai! I thought that you-!"  
  
"Maa maa it's no problem," the man said dusting himself off. "I shouldn't have snuck up on you like that." Kaoru examined him. 'Why does he have so many swords?'  
  
"Who are you sir?" she asked curiously. The man smiled.  
  
"My name is Tokugawa, I make my own custom swords, I'm looking for a pond in hopes to catch some fish, I haven't eaten in awhile." Kaoru reached into her bag.  
  
"I have some food if you want some, here," she said giving him some bento. Tokugawa accepted it gratefully.  
  
"Arigato, oh, here, this sword may be useless when it comes to slaying but it could be used in defense," he said giving her a sword. Unlike Kenshin's sakabato, this sword had no blade at all. Kaoru looked at it but she declined.  
  
"No you don't have to I was just trying to help."  
  
"But I insist, it could come in handy you know, besides I don't need it." Finally Kaoru gave in.  
  
"Arigato, I could put this to good use." Tokugawa just grinned and looked at her belongings. "You heading somewhere uh-what's your name?" Kaoru hung her head.  
  
"I'm afraid I can't tell you my name. Just call me Sakura." Tokugawa looked confused at first but decided not to ponder on this any longer. "So where are you headed?"  
  
"I'm on my way back to Tokyo, that's my home."  
  
"What were you doing here? On vacation?" Kaoru thought this was a good way to hide the truth. 'I ought to thank him for this.'  
  
"Yeah, I came on vacation but now I want to get home." Tokugawa got his things ready. "Well then good luck Sakura, nice talking with you," he said as he left.  
  
"Likewise," Kaoru responded.  
  
~Kenshin~  
  
Slowly Kenshin awoke from his long sleep just as the sun was casting it's bright light on his cold face. As he recovered from his sleep he remembered the past events that he had encountered. He jerked up hoping that all the events that occurred were just dreams, that he was in his room and Kaoru would be there to wake him up. But when he saw the trees of the forest surrounding him his heart sank. 'So.she really is gone.' Kenshin slowly got up to his feet and started his long trudge down the dirt road towards Kyoto.  
  
~The dojo~  
  
*WHAM!!!*  
  
"Itai!!! What the hell was THAT for brat?!" Sanosuke cursed rubbing the growing bump forming on the top of his head. Yahiko was fuming, a bokken clasped in his hand.  
  
"Well you freaking wouldn't get up and help me with the chores and I've already tried to wake you up nicely but nooooo you just went on sleeping so there you go!"  
  
"What's going on in here?" Megumi asked appearing at the door. Sano growled.  
  
"The brat gave me a beating." He said shooting a death glare at Yahiko. Megumi smirked and turned to Yahiko. "Well then, arigato for saving me the hassle of doing it myself!" San's eyes went big as plates and Yahiko smirked.  
  
"Megumi!!! You're taking his side?!" Megumi smiled slyly and walked out. "Ohohohohohohohoho!!!" Veins started popping on Sano's forehead.  
  
"Just wait you little pest!!! I'll get you yet!!!" Sometime later Megumi and Sano were drinking tea on the porch while Yahiko practiced in the yard. Every now and then Sano and Megumi would steal glances at each other until eventually they looked at each other at the same time. Both blushed beet red and looked away. Silence. Just uncomfortable silence. Sano decided to break it and try his luck.  
  
"Um, Megumi I uh, have something I had been wanting to tell you for awhile." Megumi turned to him heart beating who knows how fast and a blush creeping over her face again. "Me too." They just looked at each other for a moment before a bokken connected with Sano's head.  
  
"Hey what the-!!" Yahiko grabbed Sano's collar. "Jeez Sano what's with you, you guys are going way too slow!!!" Sano sweat dropped.  
  
"What are you talking about?!" Yahiko eyed him suspiciously.  
  
"I've been watching you guys for a long time now you've got a romantic thing coming here and it's.uh, oh why don't.why don't you just kiss Megumi already?!?!" Sano and Megumi's eyes both went wider than dinner plates. "NANI?!?!?!?!?!" Megumi started to get annoyed.  
  
"What in this world are you talking about Yahiko-chan?! You'd better get those nasty thoughts out of your head if you know what's good for you!"  
  
"Hey you know it's true, and don't call me -chan dammit!!!"  
  
"If you don't get your mind out of the gutter I'm gonna tell Tsubame!" Megumi said in a sing-song voice.  
  
"You leave Tsubame out of this!!!" Sano sighed and watched the two. 'There went my chance.'  
  
~Kaoru~  
  
"Hmmmm, I guess I could explore this part of Kyoto for a bit," Kaoru said to herself as she walked around. She felt strange carrying a sword on the hilt of her kimono. 'Makes me feel like I'm Kenshin.' an image flashed in her mind. 'Kenshin.' she wondered what he was doing right now. Kaoru was exploring the town of Hakone, a place known for it's hot springs unaware that someone she greatly missed would soon catch sight of her. People around her kept their distance seeing her sword. Kaoru's cape would've covered it if the wind didn't keep blowing it off. 'At least I know I won't run into problems.' All of a sudden she bumped into something, or someone.  
  
"Oro!"  
  
"Itai!" When she looked up to see who she'd hit her sapphire eyes clashed with amethyst. She gasped 'Kenshin.' Kenshin too just stared at her. 'She.she looks so much like her.' Kaoru got up. 'I have to think quickly, I can't let Kenshin know that I'm actually Kaoru yet. Think fast. Pretend like you don't know him.' As much as she missed him she had to refrain from flying into his arms or he'll most definitely suspect something. She held out her hand.  
  
"Gomen ne, um, what's your name?" Kenshin took her hand as she helped him up. 'Her hand.it feels so familiar.like.like!...but why?'  
  
"Um, sir? You can let go of my hand now." Kenshin blushed realizing he was still holding her hand and quickly released it.  
  
"Sumanai, I'm Kenshin. Kenshin Himura. What's yours?" Kaoru was nervous at first but she spoke up.  
  
"Just call me Sakura," she said simply. Kenshin cocked his head to one side. "Okay." They just stood there for a moment or two, looking at each other. 'I didn't think I'd see him this soon.' Kaoru thought. 'She is so much like Kaoru.her eyes.they are the exact same color. Is this person related to Kaoru?' he was interrupted by her voice.  
  
"Where are you headed Kenshin?" Kenshin jerked up. 'That voice.no.it can't be..' Kaoru looked at him nervously. 'Can he tell who I am?'  
  
"What is it?" He blushed and looked at the ground. "It's nothing, I was going to visit the grave of someone greatly close to me. It's just that you look so much like her Sakura-dono." Kaoru felt like running into his arms and telling him who she really was when she heard him say 'someone greatly close to him.' But she refrained. 'I can't. If I tell him now he might be suspicious of me and think I'm a ghost or an imposter and that would freak him out.' It was just too soon. With Kenshin in a state like this and with him in so much pain he would most likely not believe her and it would lead to further pain. "I see. Who is this person?" Kenshin hung his head.  
  
"Her name was Kaoru. She was someone I met when I was still a wanderer. She had welcomed me into her home despite my horrible past and she also gave her everything to me. And then.just ad day or ago I got into some trouble with people carrying guns. I managed to knock them out but one of them shot a stray bullet that I didn't notice.and them.I felt myself being pushed out of the way and then." Kenshin's were brimming with tears. "The bullet got her.in the heart.I feel so useless.she gave me everything even her life.for me.and what did I give her?...nothing.I didn't even get a chance to tell her.how much I loved her." Kaoru's heart skipped a beat. 'Love?' Tears sprung to her eyes almost immediately. Kenshin turned around.  
  
"Sakura-dono?" Kaoru looked up and wiped the tears away. "It's nothing. It's just that.I know this Kaoru you're talking about." Kenshin looked at her.  
  
"You do?" she nodded her head. "I was going to the gravesite myself. You want to go with me?"  
  
"Okay then."  
  
~Cemetery~  
  
Kenshin stared at the girl in front of him as they both stood at the grave. 'She looks so much like her.her eyes.her hair.I feels so calm when I'm with her, like.but that can't be.' Kaoru could feel his eyes on her.  
  
"What is it Kenshin?" Kaoru asked. Kenshin faked a smile and looked back at the grave. 'That's funny, it seems pretty small for someone being buried under it.'  
  
"Shall we get going?" Kaoru slowly nodded her head. As they walked back to town Kaoru noticed that Kenshin kept glancing at her every now and then. 'I don't look that familiar do I?' "Um Kenshin, where are you headed now? I'm headed for Tokyo." Kenshin smiled.  
  
"That's where I'm headed. I live at a dojo there."  
  
"I see, I don't really know why I'm headed there. I just wander here and there but I'm hoping to find a place to stay for a bit in Tokyo." In her head she was hoping Kenshin would ask her to stay at the dojo.  
  
"You're a wanderer?" Kenshin asked. They both stopped walking.  
  
"Hai, why do you ask?"  
  
"No reason, just curious." As they continued walking towards the path leading to Tokyo Kenshin noticed that she carried a sword. Kaoru noticed his gaze and she took her sword out.  
  
"Some old man I ran into gave it to me, said it was useless if I tried to slay anyone with it but I could use it for defense." Kenshin was surprised there was another person who thought just like him.  
  
"You carry a sakabato?" Kaoru laughed. "Sort of, but there's a slight difference," she said pulling it out of its sheath. Kenshin looked at it.  
  
"There's no blade, it's dull on both sides." Kaoru slid it back. "I know, but that's how I want it." Kenshin smiled.  
  
"It seems we have a lot in common that we do." Kaoru smiled back in response. "I guess so." All of a sudden Kenshin stopped.  
  
"I know, when we get to Tokyo do you want to stay at the dojo?" Kaoru simply grinned. 'Perfect.'  
  
"I would like that." As they resumed walking, Kaoru thought of how she could break the news to the others that she was alive without freaking them. 'I don't know how I'm going to do this.' How in the world was she going to tell them she is Kaoru, and how the heck would they react?  
  
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So what do you think? I hoped you liked it! Kaoru's carrying a sword! Weird huh? Makes her look like Kenshin sister or something. But I wanted it to be interesting so there you go then. I hoped you enjoyed it and please review!  
  
~Souryusen~ 


	4. Trip to the Akabeko, Kaoru's Secret

Okay minna-san you guys seemed to be getting pretty impatient so I got this one up as soon as I could. I appreciate all your reviews and your suggestions they really mean a lot! Well anyhow, I got chapter four up so I hope you like it!  
  
Chapter Four: Cooking lessons (I decided to go with one of the suggestions I got so I hope it sounds okay!)  
  
Kaoru and Kenshin weaved through the crowded streets of Tokyo that warm afternoon in hopes of getting to the dojo.  
  
"Wow, it sure is busy out here," Kaoru mumbled after being shoved for the fifth time that day. Kenshin was in the same state, oroing every now and then.  
  
"Hai, de gozaru." Kaoru noticed they were now nearing the Akabeko. 'Oh, I bet I could keep my cover if I learn how to cook!' But then she looked at the Rurouni in front of her. 'But first I have to make an excuse to go to the Akabeko without him following.'  
  
"Kenshin?" he turned around. "Hai de gozaru?" Kaoru looked nervously from side to side.  
  
"Ano, eto, I remembered I have to meet someone at the Akabeko, you got o the dojo without me, I'll catch up later." Kenshin cocked his head to one side.  
  
"Oro? Demo you don't know where the dojo is Sakura-dono, you'll get lost." Kaoru shrugged. 'Darn I forgot about that. Better think fast.'  
  
"Ano, I know where the dojo is, I practiced with Kaoru a lot when both her parents died, I stayed there for awhile before." 'Oh yeah, I'm good.' Kenshin's eyes widened a little in surprise.  
  
"Oro, you did?" Kaoru turned around and smirked. "Didn't I just say that? Nani, is there a problem that I stayed there?" Kenshin became embarrassed by her remark.  
  
"I-Iie, if you're sure I'll see you at the dojo then." And he left. As Kaoru neared the restaurant she was hoping Tae would teach her how to cook in order to keep her cover as not to be suspicious at the dojo. But.that would mean she might have to blow her cover in front of Tae and Tsubame and Tae normally has a big mouth. 'I guess this is a risk I have to take.' "Anyone in here?" Surprisingly, the Akabeko was empty of customers. 'That's funny.' Tae and Tsubame came dashing in from the kitchen.  
  
"Hai may I-!" Tae stopped mid-way in her sentence when she took one look at Kaoru. Tsubame couldn't help but stare.  
  
"Who are you?" Kaoru pretended to look puzzled. "My name is Sakura, and you are?"  
  
"Oh, I'm Tae and this is Tsubame." Kaoru smiled. "I just came from Kyoto, I was going to stay at the Kamiya Dojo for a while." Tae looked up.  
  
"You know that place?" Kaoru pretended to look sad. "Hai, I had stayed here with Kaoru when her parents died some time ago before I became a wanderer." Tsubame looked curious.  
  
"You're a wanderer, like Kenshin?" Kaoru smiled. "Hai, I came here with Kenshin, demo, I guess he's still traumatized from Kaoru's death." Tae lowered her head as well as Tsubame.  
  
"So you know Kaoru and about her death." Kaoru felt strange talking about her death when she was really alive but she kept a straight face. "I know, I went with Kenshin to the gravesite. But if you're wondering why I'm here it's because I just wanted to meet you. Kaoru told me through letters she sent me about this place and I wanted to see it badly. She's told me wonderful things about you and how good your cooking is." Tae's and Tsubame's eyes brimmed with tears.  
  
"Kaoru-san said that?" Kaoru nodded silently. "She's told me how good your cooking is. I was hoping to learn how to cook things like that for her when she was to come and visit me in Kyoto. She said she would someday." Tae smiled. "Suman for not being at Kaoru's reception. I was in Hakone."  
  
"Don't be sorry you didn't know," Tsubame said trying to cheer up the mood. Tae decided to do the same. "Well, if you want that is, do you still want to learn a few of my recipes?" Kaoru's eyes lit up.  
  
"Hai, that would be great! Although you better watch out because I'm just as bad a cook as Kaoru!"  
  
~Dojo~  
  
"Kenshin you're back already?" Kenshin stumbled into the dojo all wide- eyed. He received a puzzled look from Yahiko, Sano, and Megumi.  
  
"What's the matter Kenshin you look like you've seen a ghost," Sano stated taking a look at Kenshin. Kenshin shook his head.  
  
"Iie, demo, we'll be having company for a while." The Kenshin-gumi looked at each other. "Who?" Kenshin sighed.  
  
"I met her in Kyoto de gozaru, she is a wanderer like me who said she knew Kaoru, she even mastered the Kamiya Kasshin Ryuu." Yahiko gasped. "Who is this person?" Kenshin smiled lightly at Yahiko's surprised face.  
  
"Well, her name is Sakura-dono, she'll be staying here for awhile. That's okay ne?"  
  
"Well yeah sure it is!" Sano said back. "You already agreed anyway didn't you?" Kenshin sweat dropped.  
  
"I suppose I did." Kenshin's eyes fell to the ground in deep thought.  
  
"Nani Kenshin?" Yahiko asked. Kenshin sighed at the ground. "Sakura-dono, she reminds me so much of Kaoru de gozaru, she has the same eyes, hair, she could almost be Kaoru' sister demo, she said she was the only child." Yahiko and Sano exchanged glances.  
  
"Does she really look like Jo-chan that much?" Sano asked. Kenshin nodded. "You'll see when she gets here de gozaru na."  
  
~Akabeko~  
  
"Wow, you've done really well!" Tsubame said after she tried the food Kaoru had cooked. Kaoru blushed lightly.  
  
"Well, it's all thanks to you guys I would've stayed a horrible cook if it weren't for you two." Tae simply grinned. "It wasn't anything special, demo how come you wanted to learn now?" Kaoru thought about the dojo.  
  
"Well, I wanted to cook something good for Kenshin and the others back at the dojo in return for letting me stay there." Tae smiled sweetly.  
  
"That's nice." Then Tsubame asked an unexpected question. "Are you related to Kaoru somehow?" Kaoru became nervous.  
  
"Why do you ask Tsubame?" Tsubame looked from side to side. "Um, eto, it's just that you look so much like her Sakura-dono." Tae nodded.  
  
"I have to admit you look almost exactly like our departed Kaoru. Are you her cousin or something?" Kaoru sighed.  
  
"Okay you two, I have to tell you a secret. It's very important that you don't tell anyone, even Kenshin and the others you have to promise okay?" Tae and Tsubame looked at each other then at Kaoru. When they saw how serious she was, they both agreed.  
  
"Okay, what is it?"  
  
~Dojo~  
  
Kenshin sat on the porch gazing at the sky. 'I hope Sakura-dono didn't get lost, she sure is talking awhile de gozaru.' He sighed softly. 'She looks so much like my Kaoru.' his eyes became wet. 'Kaoru.koishii, I miss you so much..why'd you have to leave me?'  
  
"Um, earth to Kenshin, oi what's on your mind?" Sano asked waving a hand in his face.  
  
"Oh, uh, gomen ne I was just um.thinking."  
  
"'Bout what?" Kenshin blushed but kept a straight face.  
  
"About Kaoru." Sano's eyes fell. "Still upset ne? You miss her don't you?" Kenshin nodded sadly.  
  
"Aa, sessha misses her very much de gozaru." Sano patted him on the back. "We all miss her, but don't worry I'm sure Kaoru is here somewhere with us."  
  
Kenshin's face broke into the least bit of a smile. 'Kaoru.'  
  
~Akabeko~  
  
"NANI?! Is this some sort of a joke?!?!" Kaoru did her best to calm them down. "Iie, would I joke about something like that?" Tae and Tsubame couldn't believe this. Didn't they just bury Kaoru in Kyoto?  
  
"Demo, how did you get back here if you are Kaoru?"  
  
"I came with Kenshin. I was lucky he was there and that I didn't suffocate under all that dirt!" Tae and Tsubame were still pretty skeptical about the whole thing.  
  
"This is hard for us to believe you know." Kaoru couldn't take it.  
  
"I am Kaoru!" She pulled the ribbon out of her hair and tied it up in the usual way Kaoru would wear it. Tae's and Tsubame's eyes widened.  
  
"I don't know, you may look like Kaoru demo, she was-"  
  
"Shot in the heart? Well actually, that wasn't right," Kaoru interrupted pulling down some of her kimono, exposing none other than the bullet wound. "I think you made a mistake on that one."  
  
"Then, you really are.Kaoru-chan!!!" Tae screamed as she and Tsubame hugged her hard. Kaoru hugged them back tears coming out of her eyes. "I missed you all too." Tsubame kept holding Kaoru's arm. "I bet Kenshin and the others will be happy when they here this!" At this Kaoru freaked.  
  
"IIE!" They both stared at her. "Don't you want Kenshin to know?" Tae asked. Kaoru closed her eyes.  
  
"Of course I do, demo, I can't tell them just yet. It's too soon."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
"I mean I could tell Kenshin was still pained by all this. And if I were to tell him then when he was in that state he could take this wrong way, you know, like the way you reacted when I first told you."  
  
"Oh." Tae and Tsubame said at once. Kaoru put a hand on both their shoulders. "That is why I need you two to do me a favor and not tell anyone, not even Megumi or Dr.Genzai, no one. Understand? I need you two to promise me. Don't worry when I feel the time is right, then I will tell them." Tae and Tsubame looked at each other and at Kaoru's anxious face for a moment before they both smiled reassuringly.  
  
"Don't worry Kaoru-chan, we promise."  
  
************************************************  
  
Well, there you have it. So was it okay? I promise I'll get started on the next chapter as I can but please wait until then okay? Thank you for reading and please review!!!  
  
~Souryusen~ 


	5. Back to the Dojo

Well now, as for everyone I have chapter five right here. Thank you for your patience I know it probably took awhile, but I hope you like it!  
  
Chapter five: Back at the dojo  
  
Kenshin was becoming worried. 'What is taking her so long?' Kenshin looked over at Sano, who was watching Yahiko practice.  
  
"Do you think I should go look for her?" he asked. Sano just chuckled mischievously.  
  
"Falling for another girl already are you, tsk tsk you sly one." Kenshin became ticked.  
  
"That isn't something you should joke about Sano!" he yelled eyes going amber just slightly. "You know damn well that I'm not over it yet!!!" Kenshin's screams almost made Sano jump. Kenshin doesn't curse. He must have hit the mark. Badly.  
  
"Okay Kenshin calm down. Gomen nasai, I shouldn't joke about Jo-chan like that." Kenshin bowed his head.  
  
"Iie, I shouldn't yell like that at you. You meant no harm. It's just that I really miss her and even though she's gone, I feel like I have to protect her. It's kind of hard to explain." Sano scratched his head.  
  
"You got that right I'm confused." Their conversation was interrupted by Yahiko's complaining.  
  
"Kenshin I'm hungry, hayaku and cook something!" Kenshin chuckled a little his spirits being lifted just a bit. "Maa maa Yahiko, I'll go start dinner in a moment." On that cue Kaoru came in.  
  
"Oi anyone here?" Kenshin rushed to the gate. "Sakura-dono what took you so long, did you get lost?" Kenshin asked. Sano and Yahiko just stared and stared.  
  
"Shit, Kenshin was right, this girl really does look like Jo-chan," Sano whispered in the wide-eyed Yahiko's ear. Yahiko just went on staring like a zombie.  
  
"Oh yeah, she could Kaoru's sister if she had one." Kaoru pretended to explore her surroundings. "Wow this is a nice dojo." Her gaze then fell to Yahiko and Sano. 'I hate to admit it, but I've never been so happy to see them in my life.'  
  
"Eto, my name is Sakura, who are you two?" They just stared. Kaoru became uneasy. "Is something on my face?" They snapped out of their gaze.  
  
"Oh, uh my name? It's Sanosuke. Sanosuke Sagara." He said simply.  
  
"My name is Yahiko Myojin," Yahiko added. (sorry I can't spell) Kaoru bowed in front of them. "Nice to meet you both." After just standing there for a minute or two Kenshin cut in. "Well, now that that is settled I'll show you your room." Kaoru just played along until Yahiko started complaining again.  
  
"Kenshin I'm hungry!!!" Kenshin sweat dropped. "Yahiko give me a moment I need to show Sakura-dono to her room." But Kaoru stopped him.  
  
"It's alright Kenshin, he seems pretty hungry." She turned to Yahiko. "I'll tell you what, if you show me where the kitchen is I'll cook something for all of you." Yahiko eagerly agreed and led her to the kitchen. Kenshin and Sano sweat dropped.  
  
"Those two seems to be getting along pretty well," Sano said scratching his head, a fishbone appearing in his mouth. Where does it come from? Kenshin just nodded and went into the kitchen himself.  
  
"Yahiko, while I finish chopping the vegetables can you set the table?" Yahiko just nodded and left just as Kenshin appeared in the doorway.  
  
"Smells good, what are you making?" Kaoru turned from what she was doing to look at Kenshin. "Oh, when I went to the Akabeko to visit Tae and Tsubame, they gave me some food they had extra and I decided to cook it for dinner. I know how to make beef pots just like at the Akabeko." Kenshin's eyes went wide.  
  
"You know the Akabeko?" Kaoru shook her head at him. "Mou, come on Kenshin I lived with Kaoru for some time of course I know the Akabeko!" Kenshin sweat dropped. "Hai hai." But Kenshin didn't realize where he had put his hand down when he was talking.  
  
"Ano! Kenshin!!!" Kenshin looked at here puzzled. "Oro, nan de Sakura- dono?" Kaoru pointed at him.  
  
"Your sleeve, it's on fire!" Kenshin looked at his sleeve to find little yellow flames creeping up his arm. "Ororororororororo!!!!!" Kaoru quickly filled a bucket of water and let Kenshin dip his arm sleeve and all into the bucket to put the flames out.  
  
"Arigato Sakura-dono that was a close one." Kaoru just smiled. "You had better go change clothes," she laughed and went back to cooking. Kenshin did as he was told and headed off to his room.  
  
"What happened Kenshin?" Sano asked passing him in the hallway and noticing his burnt gi sleeve. "Saa, Sessha didn't look at where his hand was going and it caught on fire." Sano just smirked. "You're being clumsier than usual." Kenshin sweat dropped. "Sessha is not clumsy de gozaru." Sano didn't listen and just headed into his room. Yahiko was out in the yard practicing again. Come to think of it, he practiced more than he usually did. After changing, Kenshin went out to check on Yahiko to find him sitting on the porch his shinai resting over his shoulder. "What are you doing Yahiko?" Kenshin asked sitting next to him. Yahiko was a bit startled by Kenshin's sudden appearance.  
  
"Oh Kenshin, I was just resting from my long training." Kenshin sat next to him and watch the sun set. He remembered how he and Kaoru sat here and watched the sun set not too long ago. Even thought they hadn't revealed their feelings yet back then, they still felt close to each other enjoying the other's company. Aside from when she was shot, that was the last time he held her in his arms. She had been sitting on his lap resting her head against his chest and Kenshin had his head resting on her shoulder. Kaoru's hands overlapped Kenshin's which were firmly around her waist. They had just been sitting there enjoying the sunset and even though they didn't say a word about their feelings there was really no need to then. But now Kenshin wished he had told her then, it would have been the perfect time. Why didn't he? Why was he so scared to? Now the chance was gone. Once again Kenshin's eyes became wet and that didn't go unnoticed by Yahiko.  
  
"Is it Kaoru again Kenshin?" Kenshin blushed and wiped the wetness from his eyes. "It's not important Yahiko, daijobou."  
  
"Guys, dinner is ready!!!" that perked everyone up. Yahiko was already way ahead of Kenshin who walked rather slowly towards the kitchen. BY the time he reached the kitchen, Sano and Yahiko were already eating.  
  
"Man Sakura, where did you learn to cook this, it's just like the beef pots at the Akabeko!" Sano said although it was kind of hard to comprehend what he was saying due to his mouth being so full. Kaoru was laughing.  
  
"The Akabeko silly, I learned how when I visited the Akabeko along time ago. If you don't already know I'm a wanderer." Sano nodded. "We know, Kenshin told us we were having company." That was when Kaoru noticed Kenshin wasn't eating.  
  
"Kenshin, daijobou? Is the food not good?" Kaoru asked. Kenshin smiled his rurouni smile and shook his head. "Iie, I'm just not hungry de gozaru yo, I will go get your room ready," he said and got up. "I'll clean up later de gozaru!" Kaoru stared after Kenshin. Sano put a hand on her shoulder.  
  
"Give him some space every once in awhile, he's still really upset about Jo- chan's death." Kaoru nodded sadly. "I know." Kaoru felt bad about causing this much pain for Kenshin. But she still felt now wasn't the time to tell Kenshin or anyone else about her big secret just yet. It was just then that Yahiko started choking so Sano had to go help him leaving Kaoru to so called 'find' Kenshin herself. Actually, she didn't have to because he just showed up.  
  
"Come Sakura-dono I'll show you to your room." Kaoru nodded and followed. As she followed him further down the hallway she became puzzled. 'Why is he leading me here, isn't this...?' Kenshin stopped in front of the door to- 'Kenshin's room?!' Kaoru was confused. Kenshin cocked his head at her. "Something the matter?" Kaoru shook her head. "Iie, I was just wondering where you sleep."  
  
"Oro, oh I sleep over there," he said pointing to a room. Kaoru's eyes widened. 'Demo, that's.!' Kaoru thought. 'That's my room!!!'  
  
********************************************  
  
Was it good, terrible? Tell me! Heck kill me if you want because I know it's a short chapter but I suggest you don't if you want another chapter! Hehe yeah I can be pretty heartless! Anyways thank you for reading and I'll see you in the next chapter (if I live till then ^_^)! 


	6. Revealed under cover of Darkness

Hey everyone I'm sorry I haven't updated in such in a long time. The credit for this chapter goes to Nicky, thank you for supporting me! This story is for her! Oh and now is your chance to find out who won the vote!  
  
Chapter five: Revealed under cover of Darkness  
  
Kaoru tossed and turned sleeplessly in the futon that was lent to her. She was in Kenshin's room, this was so weird! But it felt kind of…almost good. The scent of scandal wood surrounded her. Kenshin's scent. It was almost like Kenshin was right there with her. Kaoru felt a little guilty stricken for keeping this a secret from him, but she felt it was still too soon to tell him. It was just too soon. Certain no one would bother her, Kaoru no longer has her disguise on. She rolled onto her back and stared at the ceiling. 'Kenshin…how long am I gonna keep this from you?' How she wished he was here with her. The futon, this one wasn't hers so she wasn't adjusted to it either. Where was her futon anyway? Whatever happened to it? She was about to shake this thought off when she heard a soft sound coming from her room. 'Kenshin?' Quiet as a cat, she crept out of the room she was staying in and went to her room. More like Kenshin's now. She creaked his door open just a little, surprised that Kenshin didn't notice she was there. She saw him, he was sitting cross-legged on a futon, his red bangs hiding his eyes. She could see tears fall every now and then onto the futon he was sitting on. 'That futon looks familiar.' She thought, it dawned her. Wait a sec, that was her futon! Not only is Kenshin staying in HER room but he's also sleeping on HER futon! Tears started to flow down Kaoru's face. Kenshin was this upset over her? He missed her that much? Kenshin quietly spoke her name and mumbled something she couldn't make out. It took all her willpower to not go bursting into Kenshin's arms and especially not to blow her secret. With a heavy, guilty-struck but inaudible sigh, she stumbled back into her room. Kenshin too, was in a pretty pitiful condition. Unknown to Kaoru, he had been like this ever since he had seen her 'die' right there in his arms. He stayed in her room and slept on her futon because her scent was the only thing that helped him get through the night. It somehow made him feel like she was there, right by his side. He knew she wasn't but still, it was the only thing left of her and surprisingly, her jasmine scent never got rubbed off by his own and it never faded. He wanted her back so badly, he missed her so much. Even though it had been three days ago, he still wondered why she had to die, what could've happened if he just moved a little quicker. If it weren't for him she would still be here. He had involved her in this. It was all his fault. He knew Kaoru would never hold it against him but he just couldn't seem to forgive himself for this. Without Kaoru, he was lost and empty. He didn't feel like there was anything left for him to live for. Kaoru had been his life, his reason for living and for even being here. There were so many times when he was just about to get ready to go wandering again but Kaoru, the smile she gave him, the way she said she didn't care about his past, it kept him here. There had also been times when Kenshin just wished that he was dead. That way he could be with Kaoru. He did try once to stab himself with his sakabato, but Sano and Yahiko had stopped him. They reminded him about Kaoru's last words, how she had told him she loved him and to live on for her. The dojo, everything she had, it was left with him and both their friends. He had to keep going…for her. Snuggling into what was once Kaoru's futon and breathing in her scent one more time, he let sleep overcome him.  
  
***************************************************** A few hours later, Kaoru woke up in the middle of the night again. She had managed to get at least an hour of sleep but it was still late. She tried over and over to sleep but it was no use. She sighed, she finally decided to go get some fresh air. Before she got ready she crept to all the rooms to see if everyone was asleep. Positive it was just her, she didn't bother to disguise herself. She did put on the pink kimono but she tied her hair up in the indigo ribbon the way she normally did. She knew that she would be in trouble if Sano or anyone saw her, especially Kenshin, but she was positive no one but her was awake. So quietly she crept outside. She went and sat on the porch of the dojo, just gazing at the stars. It brought back the memory of her and Kenshin sitting here watching the sunset. She felt so warm and safe when she was in his arms. A lone tear found its way down her cheek and fell to the ground, shattering like her heart. She felt like her heart was being torn apart. Still not feeling tired, she headed to the dojo, where she and Yahiko practiced. She looked over at the wall, where both hers and Yahiko's names were. She even saw the stand which held her katana which seemed untouched. Kaoru walked over to it and gently picked it up. Even though she and Yahiko fought a score of times, she lived him like the brother she never had. She wondered how Yahiko and the others were taking this, mostly Yahiko. She didn't expect this to be answered. She suddenly heard and quiet but horrified and surprised gasp coming from behind her. She spun around to see Yahiko, in his nightwear staring at her in disbelief and fear. Yahiko was trembling and staring, he was frozen there. Kaoru knew she had been caught. She decided there was no choice but to tell him and hope he doesn't say a word.  
  
"Yahiko," she started as she stood up and smiled lightly, her sapphire eyes glistening in the pale moonlight. "You found me." Yahiko trembled and continued to stare.  
  
"K-Kaoru, is-is that really you?" Yahiko asked, barely taking a step forward. "Are you a ghost?" Kaoru walked towards him, slowly as not to scare him.  
  
"No Yahiko, I really am alive." She could tell Yahiko was having a hard time believing this, so she kneeled in front of him at eye level. "I know this must be a shock. Demo, Sakura, the wanderer that came here not too long ago, that was me. I came with Kenshin because I had met him in Kyoto. Kenshin didn't know it was me and right now I don't plan on telling him. I would have come with him to the dojo before but I had stopped by the Akabeko to learn how to cook from Tae and Tsubame-chan. They too, know my real identity demo they promised not to tell. I wasn't expecting you to find me so I am trusting you to make sure you don't say a word to anyone about this." Yahiko didn't know what to do or say. This was all so sudden.  
  
"Kaoru, are you really…" Yahiko didn't finish because Kaoru put a finger over his lips. "Hai Yahiko, it really is me, I was able to get out of my grave before running out of oxygen," she joked as she lowered her kimono just a little, exposing a wound. Yahiko gasped. "That's-!"  
  
"Hai, the wound I got when I ended up getting shot in order to save Kenshin." Kaoru closed her eyes to prevent tears from falling but opened them suddenly when she was tackled by something. She looked to see Yahiko, arms around her neck and crying on her shoulder. "Kaoru, why didn't you say anything? We all thought you were gone." Kaoru stroked his back to comfort him and looked him in the eye.  
  
"I can't Yahiko, you weren't even suppose to know. And I most certainly can't tell Kenshin just yet. I don't think it is the right time right now. I want you to promise me, that you won't tell a soul. Just pretend I'm still Sakura. I promise you everyone will know demo you must promise me you won't say anything okay?" Yahiko looked straight in the eye before nodding in agreement, smiling lightly. Kaoru smiled back and got an idea. "How about we give Kenshin a taste of his own medicine?" Yahiko looked puzzled.  
  
"What do you mean?" Kaoru winked at him. "It's almost morning, the sun will be out any minute. If you want you can help me make breakfast. If you never noticed, Kenshin was always working and it always made me feel lazy, you know what I mean?" Yahiko thought for a moment before nodding.  
  
"Makes me feel that way too."  
  
"Well, Kenshin isn't up yet so why don't we get some of his chores and things done and surprise him, it'd be funny to see the look on his face ne?" Yahiko had to laugh about that.  
  
"Yeah, he's gonna be hurling oro's at us." Now they were both laughing. Yahiko stood up. "Okay let's do it!" Kaoru agreed and they both headed to the kitchen giggling softly. But he suddenly stopped. Kaoru turned to look at him. "Something wrong?" Yahiko smirked. "Iie, I was just wondering, can you cook anything else that won't poison us? I have to admit your cooking was good." Kaoru smiled. "I can't cook much, demo let me show you what I can cook."  
  
*****************************************  
  
Well it's finished! I hope it wasn't too depressing. If any of you weren't voting for Yahiko, I'm sorry but he was the one with the most votes. It was almost Sano. I am also very sorry that the chapters are too short. Flames are welcome! Please review, you guys are very good at it! 


	7. The Other Way Around

Okay here is chapter seven, the one you guys wanted so badly. I don't have much to say so just go on and enjoy this chappie!  
  
Chapter Seven: The Other Way Around  
  
Kenshin slowly woke up from his deep sleep as the first rays of sunlight seeped into the room. He looked out the window and saw two birds in a nest together with their young, chirping happily. Kenshin sighed sadly. He was hoping that one day, he and Kaoru could live together just like that. But it wouldn't happen, and he was sure it never would. He slowly got up and put on his hakama and gi then went into the kitchen to prepare breakfast like he normally did before everyone got up. Or so he thought.  
  
"Oro?" Kenshin said eyes going wide when he entered the kitchen to find the Kaoru finishing setting the table. Kaoru looked up at him and smiled giggling on the inside. 'He looks so funny like that.'  
  
"Ohayou Kenshin, thought you might be hungry so I making some breakfast. I'm surprised with Yahiko he's really a good help the two of us are already getting along quite nicely." Kenshin stared for a moment or two before reality struck him.  
  
"Oro! Ano, Sakura-dono you really didn't have to do this de gozaru." Kaoru laughed. "It's no big deal Kenshin." Just then Yahiko's voice was heard from the kitchen.  
  
"Oi Ka-Sakura it's burning!" Kaoru sat upright. "Oh! Coming Yahiko just a minute!" She bowed at Kenshin slightly before heading to the kitchen. "Go ahead and sit down, I'll bring the food out in a minute." Kenshin obeyed and sat down, his gaze falling nowhere in particular. 'Did Yahiko almost call her Kaoru? Demo, why?' Kenshin shook the thought off. 'Perhaps he just wasn't thinking straight.  
  
"Yahiko be careful, you almost let it slip!" Kaoru scolded while finishing with the cooking. Yahiko started placing the food on the table. "Gomen, I didn't mean to." Kaoru sighed.  
  
"Daijobou Yahiko, just try to get used to calling me Sakura," she said as she carried the last of the food and set it on the table. Kenshin just stared at everything. He was not use to this. He was use to doing everything and cooking breakfast. Kaoru could tell he was surprised by her actions. She stole a glance at Yahiko who winked at her. She grinned.  
  
"Yahiko can you go wake up Sano, I'm sure he won't want us to eat without him or he'll throw a fit!" she joked surprising Kenshin. Yahiko agreed laughing quietly. "You got that right, I'll go get him." Kenshin looked over at Kaoru.  
  
"You are right demo how did you know?" Kaoru cocked her head at him quizzically. "Know what?"  
  
"That Sano would throw a fit," he answered. "From what I see you never heard of him." Kaoru sweat dropped. 'Uh oh. Think fast Kamiya!' Kaoru waved her hands in the air.  
  
"Eto, while I was cooking Yahiko was telling me things about all of you!" she said somewhat calmly. 'Oh yeah, smooth.'  
  
"Oh, sou ka," he responded.  
  
"Why do you ask?" Kaoru asked. Kenshin couldn't really think of an explanation for that one. "I was just curious is all, nothing really Sakura- dono." Once Yahiko and Sano, much to his surprise that they waited for him had come they started eating.  
  
"Wow Kenshin this is good," Sano said stuffing his moth. Kenshin smiled. "It is demo sessha didn't cook it de gozaru." Sano looked up. "You didn't, then who?"  
  
"Sakura did," Yahiko said pointing to her. Kaoru simply grinned. "Don't choke now." Sano looked at her. "Since when did she start doing the work here Kenshin?" Kenshin sweat dropped. "She happened to be up even before me de gozaru." Yahiko smirked and Kaoru just sipped her tea quietly. Having finished up before everyone she picked up her dishes and put them in the sink.  
  
"Just put all the dishes in the sink when you're finished and I'll clean them later," she said before heading out. "Where are ya going?" Sano asked curiously. Kaoru smiled more to Yahiko than him who was snickering softly.  
  
"I never finished the laundry I started because I had to cook breakfast. I'll go finish it now." Kenshin sputtered his tea wetting his clothes. Kaoru couldn't help but giggle. "I'll have to wash that too." Kenshin stared in astonishment.  
  
"Sakura-dono, you're the guest de gozaru, you shouldn't be doing the chores you don't have to." Kaoru gave him a grin. "Oh really, well I figured I could. A friend of mine once told me about a wanderer who stayed here and always did the chores around the house. She use to tell me how she wouldn't keep saying 'You don't have to.' Demo he was just too stubborn. I figured since I'm a wanderer I could do the same thing. It's to repay you for letting me stay here." Kenshin was dumbstruck. She had a really good point there, he did always do the work here and everything despite what anyone said. Kaoru smirked at the look Kenshin had plastered on his face.  
  
"Looks like I've hit the mark," she said before heading outside, Yahiko in uncontrollable fits of laughter. "I guess you just got a taste of your own medicine Kenshin, you have competition!" Yahiko said in between giggles. Sano was giggling too.  
  
"Never thought I'd see the day when Kenshin would meet his match!" Kaoru hung around listening to their rantings and smiled to herself. 'Let's just see how Kenshin will handle today.' For once, Kaoru found doing all the chores rather fun. As she did the laundry, she noticed Yahiko was the one cleaning the dishes.  
  
"Yahiko, don't worry about the dishes I'll clean them just as soon as I finish this," she called out to him. Kaoru got a head shake in response. "No need to worry Sakura, I got it and besides it's fun to torture Kenshin like this," he said laughing at his joke. Kaoru snickered. "Point taken." Kenshin sighed overhearing their conversation. 'This feels strange de gozaru.'  
  
"Kenshin, would you like me to prepare a bath for you?" Kaoru asked almost startling him. Kenshin smiled his rurouni smile. She missed that smile. "Iie, it's alright Sakura-dono I'm just fine why don't you let me finish the laundry?" Kaoru shook her head.  
  
"I said I've got it, my goodness Kaoru was right when she said you were in love with doing the laundry." Kenshin fell over anime style oroing at the sky. Kaoru sweat dropped. "Oops, gomen ne. I shouldn't have said anything about..." Kenshin's eyes were glistening but he was still smiling. "No harm done, you don't have to feel sorry de gozaru ka." Just as Kaoru was about to help him up, she was pounced on from behind by two other people." Kenshin's eyes widened. "Oro, Ayame, Suzume where did you come from?" They weren't listening, they were busy all over Kaoru.  
  
"Kaoru nee! Where have you been!!!!" They both squealed both of them hugging either of her arms. Kaoru smiled sweetly at both of them. "Kaoru nee, is that what you called her?" They looked at her with curious eyes. "You not Kaoru nee?" Kaoru shook her head.  
  
"I'm Sakura, you must be Ayame and Suzume, you guys are a lot bigger than when I first saw you two." Ayame stared. "You look just like Kaoru nee."  
  
"Hai Kaoru nee, are you her twin?" Suzume asked. Kaoru giggled, these two were something else. "No I'm not but I knew her. She told me how much you guys liked playing if you guys want I'll play with you two as soon as I finish here ne?"  
  
"Yay! Play play!" They both yelled jumping around leaving Kaoru in a laughing fit. They were so cute. Dr. Genzai appeared at the gate not too long afterwards to see what all the commotion was about.  
  
"What's going on over hear and-who are you?" he asked looking at Kaoru. Kaoru stood up brushing herself off. "I'm Sakura a wanderer and an old friend of Kaoru's. I just got here from Kyoto and visiting Kaoru's grave." Dr.Genzai smiled sadly. "Oh, Kaoru never told me about you my name is Dr.Genzai and these two here are my grand daughters Ayame and Suzume." Kaoru nodded.  
  
"I already met those two, after I finish here I promised them that we'd play together." Ayame and Suzume jumped on her, holding either side of her kimono and hanging on laughing the whole time. "Play Sakura nee!" Kaoru laughed. "Alright you two better run or I'll get you!" She said chasing them. They squealed in delight as they ran away from their pursuer. Dr.Genzai looked at the three. "She gets along very well with them. This is almost exactly like when you came here Kenshin." Kenshin nodded watching the three playing. This was exactly like when he first came. His eyes saddened a little. This reminded him of how Kaoru had welcomed him here just like he did with Sakura. What reasons she had for wandering he didn't know but he knew his and Kaoru never did care. He felt like he was now in her place. Dr.Genzai noticed Kenshin's slightly sad look.  
  
"Is it Kaoru?" he asked sadly. Kenshin remained silent. "Don't worry Kenshin it's alright, I must say she looks a lot like her wouldn't you say?" Kenshin tried to lighten up by smiling.  
  
"Yes she looks a lot like her de gozaru. It is strange but when I look at her it's almost like I am looking at Kaoru, like she is..."  
  
"Kaoru's reincarnation." Dr.Genzai finished. "I know what you mean, after all Sakura does have her eyes and her hair. She just very well could be." Kenshin felt his heart tighten. Kaoru reincarnated? He suddenly felt strange. In his heart, just like Tomoe he could never replace Kaoru. But there seemed to be something about this girl that did resemble her.  
  
"Sakura, can I ask you a favor?" It was Yahiko who appeared in the doorway. Kaoru appeared with the two girls clinging to her kimono again. "Nani Yahiko?" Yahiko scratched his head pretending to look embarrassed. "Well eto, I heard you mastered the Kamiya Kasshin Ryuu just like Kaoru once did and I was wondering if you could-"  
  
"Train you? I probably can if you want." She answered winking at Yahiko. "Just get me a training hakama and we can." Yahiko grinned and headed into the dojo. While he was gone Kaoru went inside and to see if the kitchen still needed cleaning the girls not far behind. Kenshin attempted to catch up. "What are you going to do now?" he asked.  
  
"Just see if I still need to finish the dishes from before, then I'll head to town to buy supplies for lunch is all. Maybe I'll go fishing, do you have a pole?" Kenshin oroed again and waved his hands. "Sakura-dono, really there's no need for this I can go fishing de gozaru." Kaoru loved this. "Kenshin daijobou I said. Demo, I am not very good with a fishing pole so why don't we both go and you can teach me how." Genzai cut in. "I can teach you too if you want, the girls love going fishing."  
  
"That's sounds like fun, you two want to go fishing?" she asked Ayame and Suzume.  
  
"HAI!" they both screamed. Kenshin giggled a bit. He was surprised he even laughed. "I guess we'll all be going fishing de gozaru."  
  
"Yay, fish!" the two girls cheered running around the room. Yahiko appeared with the training hakama. "Here you can put this on," he said handing it to her. "Arigato I'll just go change then we'll both go to the dojo to train okay?" Yahiko nodded while he went to get his shinai. Kenshin decided he would just get the dishes done. Finally, something to do. Ayame and Suzume were now playing with a paper ball and Dr.Genzai was watching them, Yahiko was waiting for Kaoru to finish changing.  
  
In her room, Kaoru was wondering if she should keep her hair in a low ponytail. 'But it gets hot.' She said to herself, but then, if she put it up high she would most definitely draw attention. Giving up, she decided she would just wear it up but with her red ribbon. She never wore a ribbon when practicing. Once she was ready she went out to where Yahiko was waiting. Everyone's mouths dropped. Despite the ribbon she had in her hair she looked exactly like Kaoru, causing everyone's eyes to widen.  
  
"Whoa." Was all Yahiko could say, Kenshin was oroing, and everyone else was staring.  
  
"Sakura nee looks like Kaoru nee!" Ayame and Suzume said examining her. Kaoru began to feel uncomfortable. The way Kenshin was looking at her was making her nervous. He seemed to be looking at her in a way he normally would Kaoru. 'Maybe I should've just kept my hair down.'  
  
"Well, come Yahiko you said you wanted to train right? Let's go!" she took off towards the dojo. Yahiko sweat dropped. "Uh, right!" he said going to follow her. 'Man, I swear Kaoru should not have put her hair up.' Once they were out Dr.Genzai breathed heavily. "I have to say I almost thought that was Kaoru," he said looking at the wide glistening eyes of Kenshin who was staring off in the direction Sakura and Yahiko went. 'I think that could be her..Kaoru...have you...come back?'  
  
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Uh oh, I think Kenshin is on to her! O_O Did you guys like this chapter? I tried to make it longer than the last one because after this I'll be gone for the weekend so, I'll see you guys later and I'll get started on another chapter when I get back! I'll miss you all and please review! ^_^ 


	8. His Wish Unrequited

Well I am back and I have finished chappie 8! I just hope you all enjoy it, I did have fun on vacation but I couldn't wait to get back here! ^_^  
  
Chapter 8: Fishing trip and a sudden attack. Is this love again?!  
  
"Yahiko be careful not to leave your chest open!" Kaoru shouted as she blocked another of his attacks. Yahiko nodded and got back into a fighting stance this time blocking an attack made by Kaoru. Kaoru smiled in approval and stood up.  
  
"I think that's enough for now, you did very well today," she said as they both headed back to the house. "I'm impressed at how much you have improved." Yahiko simply smirked.  
  
"I just practiced a lot is all, I bet pretty soon I'll be able to beat you at your own style!" Kaoru gave him an impish grin. "We will see Yahiko- chan, in the meantime however there's no chance." With that, she took off running. "Last one to the house is a rotten egg!" Yahiko fumed and sprinted after her.  
  
"No fair you had a head start!!! And for the love of kami-sama don't call me chan!!!!!" Kaoru kept on running looking behind her to see that Yahiko was falling behind. 'Even now I can still tick him off.' But she wasn't looking where she was going and ran smack into Kenshin who was about to head out to check on them.  
  
"Oro!" Kenshin screamed falling over and landing on what wasn't really the ground.  
  
"Ow, my head..." Kaoru murmured painfully rubbing the large bump that was forming. She looked at who she had bumped into and stood up offering her hand.  
  
"Whoops, suman Kenshin I wasn't looking," she apologized helping him up. Once again he seemed reluctant to release her hand as he kept staring into those deep sapphire eyes. 'I swear they are just like Kaoru's.' Kaoru for some reason couldn't move. It was like his gaze was petrifying her. 'Oh god, why is he looking at me like he's going to eat me?'  
  
"Well, if you will please excuse me I need to change back into my dis-I mean kimono so we can go fishing," she said before getting up and walking away. 'What the hell is wrong with me I almost let it slip!' Kenshin stared after her. 'There is something weird going on but I can't put my foot on it de gozaru.'  
  
"So Yahiko, have you been training a lot with her? You seem pretty good," Kaoru told him as they all walked to the spot they were to go fishing at. It had been a few weeks now since she came to the dojo again. Kenshin kept glancing at her. "Yeah, even though she's no longer here I know she would still want me to practice so that's what I do." Kaoru felt touched by his words.  
  
"Hmmm that's impressive, no wonder you are so good, why don't you try beating me sometime?" Kaoru asked. She got a sly smile in response. "Sure, you're on." "Hey guys we're here," Kenshin said when they came to a grass clear with a tree perfect for sitting under at the edge of a calm river. Kaoru had never been here even when she was 'alive'.  
  
"Wow this place is nice Kenshin," Kaoru said admiring the scenery. Kenshin smiled. "Glad you like it Sakura-dono why don't the rest of you guys rest under there and I can teach you to fish."  
  
"Sounds good," Kaoru agreed. While they were fishing, they didn't realize someone was stalking them.  
  
"There they are, and there's the redhead guy who spoiled our fun," one of the thugs whispered. Apparently they had escaped jail. The leader instructed them. "Ready, and attack!" They all jumped out and surrounded them. Both Kenshin and Kaoru drew their swords.  
  
"Looks like those guys are back and they've got friends. There are ten now," Kenshin said. "I don't know who these people are but I'll take on half of them," Kaoru said to Kenshin as they got into their fighting stances. Actually, the fight only lasted a couple minutes since the thugs were such idiotic fighters. Kenshin and Kaoru had them all laying on the ground in mere minutes.  
  
"I see you are good with Kamiya Kasshin Ryu," Kenshin complimented when they both sheathed their swords. "You aren't bad yourself Kenshin," Kaoru replied. However, before they could head back to contact Saitoh about this Kaoru was unaware her yukata was open a little but one of the thugs noticed and said something that Kaoru wished he hadn't. "I..thought...I shot you girl.." he said before passing out.  
  
*****Don't worry it doesn't end there******  
  
Kaoru spun around. "W-What?!" she asked. Kenshin was confused until he saw a fraction a healing wound that looked like....masaka!  
  
"That looks just like-!!!" Kenshin started. Kaoru quickly covered her wound up. "It's nothing really," she said. "Let's just go home." After they had contacted Saitoh and that was taken care of they decided to just head into town to by tofu for dinner and headed home. Kenshin felt something oddly familiar in that girl's ki during the fight. He was sure now that she was somehow linked to Kaoru. Was she somehow reborn as another? He knew one thing. He was falling in love again. He didn't care how fast this was he was going to tell her. Kaoru noticed the look Kenshin was giving her. She panicked. 'I..I know that look...that was the same one he gave me when...masaka! So fast?! It can't be!'  
  
******************************************************************  
  
After dinner just as Kaoru was going to get ready for bed, Kenshin stopped her. "Sakura-dono, can I talk with you for a moment?" he asked. Kaoru was nervous, she didn't want to but if she didn't he could get suspicious.  
  
"Um, hai. What is it?" Kenshin lead her to the porch where they were looking at the stars. "You know, Kaoru and I used to watch the stars like this," he told her. Kaoru suddenly felt queasy. "I see."  
  
"When she died, I didn't feel like living anymore. I wanted to kill myself so I could be with her." Kaoru gasped. 'Kenshin....' Kenshin turned to her. :Demo, when I saw you I suddenly felt like she was there. You helped me get over this and move on and you once again brought happiness here. I didn't think I could ever feel that again." Kaoru was becoming nervous. Why is he saying all this? He took her hands in his. "K-Kenshin?"  
  
"I know it seems fast," he said. "Demo, I'm sure of this. I wanted to say thanks for helping me recover and...." he paused and kissed her on the forehead. "I love you Sakura." Kaoru's eyes widened and tears suddenly sprung to her eyes. Kenshin immediately felt guilty.  
  
"S-Suman, I shouldn't have-"  
  
"Iie, it's fine. I'm just....I don't know what to say." Kenshin gave her a smile. "You don't have to right now. I just wanted you to know, it's getting late we should go to bed." He told her. Kaoru simply nodded and went towards the bedroom. "Goodnight Kenshin."  
  
"Goodnight Sakura."  
  
Once Kaoru was in her room she shut the door and let herself cry. 'I can't believe this. I should have just told him, demo....and now he loves me? What will happen when he finds out who I really am?' Kaoru seemed lost. It was like she reached a dead end. "I shouldn't stay here anymore." She said sadly. "I don't deserve to, not after this. When Kenshin catches me I just know he'll hate me for this..I have to leave now." It was decided. She would leave and become a wanderer. She has already started wandering before and she was accustomed to it. Plus she had a sword for defense so it shouldn't be much of a problem. But before she left she wrote a letter to Kenshin confessing about the truth and then got ready. She had to write it a couple of times because she kept crying while writing it. Once she was packed she quietly tiptoed to his room, slid the letter under his door and crept out. As she exited the dojo gates she took one last look at what she was leaving, what had been her home and the one she loved. 'Thank you for everything Kenshin. Demo, I don't deserve to be here anymore. I love you and I always will. I'm so sorry for causing you so much pain, it will be better this way. I have become a wanderer and I probably should stay this way now. It's my fault I'm like this, I'm sorry for lying to you. Demo as you once said it's time to wander again.' "Sayonara...Kenshin...." She whispered tears overflowing from her sapphire eyes. With a heavy heart she walked down the road, almost unconsciously heading for Kyoto.  
  
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Yahiko all of a sudden sat up cold sweat running down his face. 'I had the worst dream that Kaoru left to wander again like Kenshin.' Yahiko was sure it was just a dream but he had a bad feeling. Just to be sure, he went to Kaoru's room to check on her only to find, to his horror, she really did leave. It was too early for Kenshin to be up but the sun was rising so he ran to his room and forced open the door.  
  
"Kenshin!!!!!" he yelled panic written all over his face. Kenshin sat up and looked at Yahiko worriedly. "What is it Yahiko?" he suddenly noticed he was standing on what looked like a note.  
  
"Yahiko there's something under your foot." Yahiko looked down and picked up the note. As he looked at it the color drained from his face. "Kenshin, it's for you." Before he handed it to him he said. "I was going to tell you this a while later or not actually me, demo..I ..I didn't know..." "What are you saying?" Kenshin asked. Yahiko looked down. "Just read this, it'll explain everything." Kenshin took the note and began to read.  
  
Kenshin,  
  
By the time you read this, I will have already left. I don't deserve to stay here anymore. You need to know the truth why I left and..who I really am. Sakura never existed. And I was never dead. Yes, Sakura who you knew as a wanderer was really me, Kaoru. I wandered around for awhile when I bumped into you so I was getting accustomed to wandering. Everything, it was all a lie. And Tae, Tsubame, and Yahiko. They knew all along, demo, I told them not to tell you because I didn't want to at the time. I thought it would only bring more pain. But I made a horrible mistake. I made you fall in love with someone who was never there. I just caused more pain. I shouldn't have lied. You probably hate me now. I'm truly sorry for this and you don't have to forgive me. I know I can't forgive myself. It's best that I left, you will be happier this way and you can find someone who can love you the way you deserve to be. Tell the others I'm sorry and about the truth onegai. And arigato for everything, demo, I am now a wanderer and as you said once it's time that I wandered again. Demo, no matter what I love you and I always will. Sayonara...Kenshin...  
  
Love,  
  
Kaoru Kamiya  
  
Tears streamed down his face. Kaoru, she had been alive all along. And he never knew she was right there. He was hurt that she didn't tell him the truth but he didn't care about it now. She only did what she thought was best. He just wanted her back, but it had been long since she left. Kenshin looked at the note again still crying. Even after what he said last night she still loved him. Yahiko could see his tears.  
  
"I'm sorry Kenshin.... I-"  
  
"Yahiko, tell the others about this and that I'll be gone for awhile. I don't know when I'll be back."  
  
"Where are you going?" Yahiko asked. Kenshin picked up his sword and started packing. "I'm going after Kaoru and I'm bringing her back." "Then I'm coming with you!" Yahiko exclaimed. "I want to help find her."  
  
"Yahiko, I need you to stay here and do this for me, I will be fine." Yahiko tried to protest. "Demo you don't even know where Kaoru went!"  
  
"You are right, I don't know. Demo she left just last night so she shouldn't have gone too far. And I have a hunch where she might be going. Twice I let her slip right past me. But this time, I'm not letting her go...ever." Yahiko smiled. "Alright, good lick Kenshin!" Kenshin smiled and exited the dojo walking down the same path Kaoru had taken.  
  
"Koishii, don't worry I'm coming to get you and I'm going to bring you back home where you belong. And this time...I won't let you go."  
  
***************************OWARI************************************  
  
Alright the next chapter is done! I know I'm evil. Don't freak because it's complete. Just look here:  
  
Coming Soon:  
  
Wandering the Opposite Direction  
  
The sequel to I ain't dead you know! For awhile it's always been Kaoru going after Kenshin. But what happens when Kenshin has to go after her? It's a story of how Kenshin will go anywhere and do anything to get the one he loves back. But can he get her back if she keeps pushing herself away like Kenshin once did? Will he be able to save her and bring her home like she did him?  
  
You won't wanna miss this! It's coming soon!  
  
Thank you for reading and please review! 


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